"Do You TAKE THIS MAN TO LOVE, HONOR, AND AGREE WITH
UNTIL--YOU SEE ANOTHER MAN YOU LIKE BETTER?"]
MY COUP D'ETAT.
Mr. PUNCHINELLO: For sometime--I would not like to say how long--the
undersigned has been a candidate for the office of Whiskey Inspector for
the Judasville district of his State. I have had powerful backing from
the scrap-iron members of Congress from my section, but their efforts
and my own have long seemed of little avail. The other day, however,
I saw in the papers the account of the _coup d'etat_ of the DUKE OF
SALDANHA, in Portugal. An idea immediately entered my brain. These
_effete_ monarchies, these governments of the past, on which "the rust
of ages," as VICTOR HUGO remarks, "lies like a bloody snow of bygone
vassalage," have yet sufficient vitality to teach a lesson to the young
and vigorous governments of the West. At any rate this old duke taught
me a lesson, and I did my best to hurry off and say it. It was evident
that if I wanted to be Whiskey Inspector of Judasville, (and I am
justified in saying that no man in the district possesses more peculiar
qualifications for the post,) that something in the SALDANHA style
must be done.
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