.. I know that no word of mine urged Edric to this
deed, but what my eyes may have said, or some trick of my voice or my face, is
not so sure... It may be that I wanted this thing to happen without knowing
it. When I see what it has brought me, I cannot understand how I could help
wanting it... It is true that I do not always know for certain what I have at
heart." His eyes came back from space to rest musingly on Elfgiva. "When I
began this feasting-time, I thought I had grasped heaven with my hands, but
now--" he spread out his fingers and released the little bunch of dead leaves
that he had been rolling against his palm--"now I let not this go from me more
easily... You see that a man is not sure even of his own mind."
Again his head was sinking on his breast, when he raised it with a fierceness
that startled them. "One thing only I am sure of, and that is that I have done
forever with craft. Hereafter, if a man is a hindrance to me, Rothgar's axe
shall send him to Hel while it is broad daylight and all his friends are
looking. Such is my luck with craft as though I had grasped a viper by the
tail, in the belief that I had seized its snout... I have been finely
treated... Not only have I been betrayed by all of you who have thought such
thoughts of me, but now some troll has got into me and turned me false to
myself so that I cannot give you punishment for your treason! Certainly the
gods must think this crown of great value since, before they give it to me,
they take from me all that I have thought my happiness, and rob me of my honor
as well!"
He dashed his fist against the tree beside him and did not seem to feel it
when his hand was bleeding.
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